#different

Deal with it.

Honestly, I have no idea what "hashtag" even means. All I know is that right now in America, the trend is to say "hashtag" and follow with an incomplete sentence or single word and expect other people to understand whatever the heck you are trying to say. I would much rather people just say what is on their minds in a coherent sentence or paragraph instead of leaving me to wonder about their poor grammar and word choice.

Enough about that, though.

If you have read my blogs up to this point, then you have most likely figured out that I am different from you in a variety of ways. I will now point out more deviations.

I am an It, an It is no single thing. That being said, I also do not have a specific trait that defines me. I am not the fastest, the smartest, the wisest, the bravest, nor do I wish to be any of these things. If I, as an "It" were to be defined by a certain thing, I would be giving up my very identity of having no identity. I would much rather be many things.

I have been told from a very young age that I am "special" and that I think differently.

GOOD RIDDANCE!

I can only imagine how boring life would be if I was just like everyone around me. It sounds like a distopia, where everyone is of one mind and those who differ slightly are cast away. Nothing would ever be accomplished. Nothing new would be created, it would just be one giant monopoly.

You know, when I was small, being told that I was different sparked two radically different ideas about the world in my mind. One idea produced fear, loneliness, and the desire to conform as quickly as possible. The other idea gave way to a rebuttal, which gave some comfort, but this idea was quieter than the first, and I could not trust it, so I had no confidence. These were the two ideas;

1) Everybody in the entire world had the same ideals and I was alone, and would be until I died or acted like "Normal" people.

2) Everyone is different in one way or another, so my being different shouldn't be an issue.

For a long time I believed in the first idea.

I took the form of those around me. I studied the people's behavior and listened to what was commonly talked about. I mirrored whomever I spoke to.

And ended up a wallflower, more alone than ever before.

It turns out that people don't want to talk to someone who will feed them their own information and agree to all of their opinions.